Last week, I had the privilege to be part of a discussion on whether all men cheat and why members of the male gender find it difficult to maintain a lifestyle of sexual purity. One of the participants in the discussion had shared the story of a woman who said on national TV, that her husband probably cheats on her since all men cheat. I have heard several women make comments in line with this sentiment which philosophers term as fallacy of hasty generalisation.
I do not believe that all men cheat but I don’t blame women who think their men cheat for thinking so. I am certain, like someone else pointed out in the forum, that their sentiments were formed based on their personal experiences or other people’s. I have seen a movie in which a man made his life’s purpose exposing women who were cheating on their husbands after nabbing his wife in the act. He vehemently preached that all women in the village cheated on their husbands and it was only a matter of time before every secret will be made plain.
My focus in this piece is not to delve into the issue of whether all men or women have infidelity flowing in their blood streams. I want to look at a deeper issue which is about the problems with our families, homes and marriages.
It is my understanding that our homes are microcosm of our society. Thus, any change that will occur in our society must first start in our homes.
If we cannot have men who are faithful to their wives with a resolution to lead a life of integrity, responsibility and being worthy examples to their children, in whom then lies our hope?
If we cannot have women who will embrace modesty, reveal the intelligence and graciousness of womanhood and radiate a beauty that comes from submission, where then is our hope?
If we cannot have young men and women who will value discipline, contentment and hard work not exchanging their destinies for an immediate but unsatisfying gratification of their lustful desires, how bleak is our future?
So, when I read again, Tolu Oguntowo’s life-message which he shared in an earlier post on this blog, God’s Man, Seun Tella’s letter to the female child in her Dear Everian series, and Timi Yeseibo’s series on the Portrait of Motherhood, I knew there was hope for us. So, I just want to invite you to make a commitment to being different.
I want to ask you to seek knowledge on how you can be the man/woman God created you to be; how you can become the lady that bears so much influence on her nation like the Biblical Esther; how you can be a source of hope to the children around you.
I want to invite you to be part of a generation that is committed to the ideals of responsibility, discipline, hard work and a lifestyle of transforming rather than conforming to the corrupted culture around us. This little light of yours, will you be resolute and committed to making it shine, even in the face of intense darkness? Think about it.